Sea Shells

SallyA couple lived near the ocean and used to walk the beach a lot. One summer they noticed a girl who was at the beach pretty much every day. She wasn’t unusual, nor was the travel bag she carried, except for one thing: She would approach people who were sitting on the beach, glance around furtively, then speak to them.

Generally, the people would respond negatively and she would wander off, but occasionally someone would nod and there would be a quick exchange of money for something she carried in her bag. The couple assumed she was selling drugs and debated calling the cops, but since they didn’t know for sure they just continued to watch her.

After a couple of weeks the wife asked, “Honey, have you ever noticed that she only goes up to people with boom boxes and other electronic devices?” He said he hadn’t. Then she said, “Tomorrow I want you to get a towel and our big radio and go lie out on the beach. Then we can find out what she’s really doing.”

Well, the plan went off without a hitch, and the wife was almost hopping up and down with anticipation when she saw the girl talk to her husband and then leave. C-CellThe man walked up the beach and met his wife at the road. “Well, is she selling drugs?” she asked excitedly.

“No, she’s not,” he said, enjoying this probably more than he should have.

“Well, what is it, then?” his wife fairly shrieked.

The man grinned, “She’s a battery salesperson.”

“Batteries?” cried the wife.

“Yes” he replied. “She sells C cells by the seashore.”

About Wyrd Smythe

The canonical fool on the hill watching the sunset and the rotation of the planet and thinking what he imagines are large thoughts. View all posts by Wyrd Smythe

8 responses to “Sea Shells

  • dianasschwenk

    Groan! LOL You reeled me like a fish haha!

    • Wyrd Smythe

      I know, right? The good ones always sound so reasonable right up to the punchline! As much as I love the one about the Dead Duck, it does signal something, ’cause you’re wondering, “Why a duck?” (Of course, in that case it actually turns out to be a red herring, but it still serves to alert you that something’s up!)

  • reocochran

    Oh, you sunk that line, you placed a hook baited me, and caught me unawares! You are so good at that! I am like above a “fish” and you may also call me a “pawn” in your game!

  • Cybuhr

    It’s dangerous for her to do that on the beach with the sea air. She could get charged with a salt and battery.

    • Wyrd Smythe

      Heh, heh, heh! As I posted this one, I had two friends in mind that I thought would love it; you’re one of them! (If all three of us ever got in the same room, I’m pretty sure we’d reach Pun Critical Mass and cause a Stage Four Pnuclear Event (the “P” is silent). Mike and I used to be able to drive people away, their ears bleeding, their senses overwhelmed and shut down. You may have a similar super power! 😀

      [Say… anyone using those “collaboration” kiosks at The Company yet? When the Facelift began and I saw the designs, I predicted that, once completed, they’d be largely ignored (no one in their right mind “collaborates” in the middle of a high-traffic hallway). Turns out, if you build it,… they don’t always come!]

      • Cybuhr

        Well, a few people had been using the hubs but not for collaboration. They were using them as a staging area en route to a meeting. But then signs went up at each of the hubs saying, Don’t set your bags on the glass. Also, I’ve seen the hubs used for photo shoots.

      • Wyrd Smythe

        Which some of us have always thought was their only purpose. A friend suggested they should have just built one in the basement they could have used for that and saved a few bucks. The irony is that it took them so long to get them working. I just wonder how much those white elephants cost the company. More importantly, I wonder if anyone learned anything from the experience. The revolting thing is that so many of us saw this from day one, but apparently no one in leadership did.

        (It’s amazing how much my stress level is reduced being out of the place!)

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